Now or never .

one long year

2011-09-17T00:34:00.000+08:00

Had this sudden urge to blog out of nowhere. So trials are on for the whole month, i'd been slacking and not doing proper study for it. I want that pmr spirit to come back ! I had no idea how me and bff could study and kept doing worksheets day til night in each others house every day. Motivation, where are you ?!
Life, it seems like i know you better right now. People come and go, things change and you can't do anything. And apparently, being honest is not something easy to do? Especially to the one you love? but well, at least for me..i would be honest even if it might hurt people.
Well, things seem to be better these days i guess. At least i'm seeing the change you promised. I don't know where is this gonna lead us to, but i believe that its not wrong giving it a chance. Let's just hope this time it'll turn out to be what we've been hoping for. Sure that there'll be obstacles, but its been 3 years and more..what other obstacles we haven been through? Come to think of it, we've actually been through a lot..whether thick or thin, and no matter what happen..we still keep each other company day til night for more than 1300days. hmmm so i guess this is something to feel lucky about apart from the rest. okay i think i reveal too much today, stop with all those crap for now.
Tomorrow its gonna be a long day, visiting Zhi Qi in the memorial park at the morning. Gotta remind myself to bring bubbles and the chatime i bought her. its her 1 year death anniversary in the chinese calender, cant believe time past so fast. one year without her, without her lauaghter and gossip moments with her. I miss you Qi ! but remember what i told you ? distance wouldn't change the friendship we share and the love we have for you. you better be there tomorrow k ? Ee Quan's gonna sing for you and i have words for you too (: and not to forget, i guess we'll have the bubble session for you as well. Hopefully tomorrow night everything would go well.

Alright guess i'll stop here.
xx

m.i.a

2011-08-11T21:13:00.000+08:00

guess i've been leaving this blog dead for months. my blogging spirit had been long gone. its probably because i don't like reviewing too much on my personal life. and you people wouldn't thought that i'd been through so much, life's tough but you gotta be tougher in order to get through it.
& as all the '94 know, trials coming close..many had started studying even those not-so-serious ones, but me? many of them thinks that im studying like mad at home, but the truth is i've not started..not even a single bit. i have to seriously stop slacking after i recover.

& don't you worry, i wouldn't let people who don't matter ruin me.
being happy is the best revenge.

Jar of Hearts

2011-04-24T21:18:00.000+08:00

2011-03-30T21:49:00.000+08:00

“I want to be the one you want. The one you need. Your reason for getting up in the morning, rushing breakfast and hurrying about to catch a bus and a train or even a fucking helicopter just to come and see me. I want to know that you are mine and mine only. I want that, just that one thing from you.”

Birthday wish for a special friend

2011-03-22T15:09:00.001+08:00

Loves from the bottom of our heart

Happy Seventeen Birthday

Miss Ng Zhi Qi ♥

Zhi Qi, its the 22th of March and you're turning 17 today.

Although this year it isn't the same anymore, but I believe you're happy in heaven right now (:

Being friends for 4 years, maybe I'm not the one who know you best and I may not be the closest friend of yours.. But remember what you told me? Whenever you need me I'll be there. Same goes to you.. So whenever you feel lonely or misses us, please come to our dreams, i believe everyone of them would be happy to meet you in their dreams.

About 6 months ago, god took you away from us. He did brought you to somewhere far, but distance doesn't change the friendship we share and the love we have for you. Please do remember that you were a important part of our life, you brought so much joy and laughters to everyone around you ! Thinking back at the days we spend during the lower form of secondary, we really do have lots of silly and wild memories.....I guess i'll stop here, i just couldn't express the things i want to tell you. Once again,

Happy Birthday my beloved friend ♥

Remember the song Angel ? You're an Angel to us now (:

Our pretty angel, please do remember us as we would never forget you !

xoxo,

Crystal.

Memorial Park

2011-03-15T18:20:00.000+08:00

Happy Chinese Birthday Ng Zhi Qi ! you're officially 17 now.

Woke up on this special day to visit you, if you realise..after being friends for 5 long years, this is the first time singing birthday song to you ! Cause in the pass few years your birthday fall on the holidays. And whenever we say we wanna celebrate it for you, you would say you don't like because you don't know how to react when everyone sings you birthday song. Never thought of the first time of singing you birthday song would be in this situation. But i know you were there with us, because you didn't want us to leave til we sang you those two songs. I believe on the coming 22th, you will receive alot of birthday wishes like usual. So you better delete some of your messages ! Memory full already la :P even for today you also have so many messages d, && stay tune for the birthday post next tuesday !

xoxo

2011-03-05T22:11:00.000+08:00

" I don't wanna run away but i can't take it, I don't understand. If i'm not made for you, then why does my heart tell me that I am? " If you're not the one - Daniel Bedingfield
Feel free to listen to this song (:
I find the lyrics of this song means a lot, probably it was what i once felt.

"Smooth roads never make good drivers. Smooth seas never make good sailors. A problem-free life never makes a strong person. " Remember this whenever you feel tired and frustrated with life (:
Take it as a challenge from God, don't ever give up. Whenever you thought of giving up on your life, think of the ones that didn't have the chance to live one.

Exam xx

2011-03-05T22:00:00.000+08:00

Exam's around the corner, times passing by so fast.. Its the last year of high school & so it means its kind of the last time of 'first-term-exams' BUT still, like the years before..I'm feeling so so lazy to do my revisions. Seeing everyone around me studying hard for exams give me pressure but the worst part is, pressure isn't what thats gonna motivate me to start studying.

Good luck to everyone of you !

Life is unpredictable

2011-02-27T21:11:00.000+08:00

Do you believe in karma ? Well, I do.. I believe that what comes around goes around, its just the matter of time. At times i thought of giving up on everything around me, leaving everything behind..but she would come into my mind. Why am i giving up so fast ? Why am i giving up so easily ?

Life's full of ups and down. So when you start going way up high, be prepared to fall hard.

♥ shrs

Senior Year

2011-01-06T21:30:00.000+08:00

School just started a few days ago, all i could say is tiring -.- i just couldn't stand waking up so early in the morning & the part where you're super tired in the evening, but you're struggling not to sleep so that you could sleep earlier at night.. I just hate that feeling.
Somehow it feels great being the seniors of the school.. don't ask me why, i just enjoy the feeling :P
& Today i suddenly remembered, 4 years ago when we were still form1's our English teacher told us to write a letter to the future us.. I'm really curious what i wrote in it. But unfortunately I have no idea where those letter went, probably the school recycled it or something -.-

Will stop here, I'm exhausted !

2011

2011-01-02T01:13:00.001+08:00

Happy New Year people !

omg isn't it fast ? its already 2011..time really do flies huh.. so its a new year, new beginnings..hopefully everything we've been through in 2010, every mistake we learn from will help us through 2011 & make 2011 a better year than 2010. Its a new year and of course new resolutions must be made !

1. GAIN WEIGHT !! atleast pass 40

2. Good results (:

3. Learn to forgive and forget

4. Let go of the past ; move on

5. Cure my lazy-ness :D

6. More smile and less tears (:

7. hmmm to be coutinue :P

It was nice starting the year with all the B class people, with all those silly old memories in primary school, looking forward for the dinner with them (:

The end

2010-12-31T01:45:00.002+08:00

"Come to think about it, 2010 is going to end tomorrow. No matter how much tears we have shed, how many arguments we have been through, how many disappointments that happened, let's just close our eyes and pray. Pray for a better 2011 & make wishes to succeed in life. Let's just hope everything will turn out better. Forget the sad memories and start to make new amazing memories. Cheers to 2011."

2010

2010-12-31T00:55:00.000+08:00

Its 30th, 2 more days til 2010 comes to an end. 2010 wasn't a great year to me but somehow i just don't want it to end so soon.. Its true that maybe 2011 would be a better year, but to me its gonna be another more challenging year, another year with more 'life lessons' to learn. Its gonna be a tough year, but as time goes by people grow & of course compare to the year before we're more mature & we know how to handle things better.

2010 will be an unforgettable year for me.. as a really good friend of mine had move on, to a better place i believe. Time really flies, thinking back to the day i'd been so excited for the first day of high school and its already 4 years back. Next year will be the last year of high school and soon we'll all be separated, i really miss those old times !

Will blog bout my new year resolutions soon (:

27th

2010-12-28T00:42:00.000+08:00

A laugh that cheers you up,

a girl that is truly wonderful that no words can describe how much,

a friend you'll never forget,

a sister thats like your whole life,

a beauty so mesmerising,

this is her,

irreplaceable Ng Zhi Qi ♥

It's been 3 months, but those memories we had wouldn't fade as time goes by because every single memory you left behind for us are really unforgettable. Thinking back at those old silly moments we had, & i found the song we translated ! We'll record it with rtg members and show you :P

xoxo

Christmas !

2010-12-25T22:57:00.000+08:00

Merry Christmas !!

I'm sure everyone spend there Christmas with parties and all but this year i spend mine with Christmas sale :P

Nothing much to share, but hope everyone of you had a great one (:

2010-12-23T18:46:00.000+08:00

Its was tong yun day yesterday. Woke up extremely early, just to visit Qi in the memorial park.. I don't know how to describe the feeling but its just so uncomfortable having to visit her there. But after knowing you're still happy as always there i felt relief, happy for you as well & you're still like the same old you, daring & loves to take risk :P Promised to visit you for your birthday with all your favorite food, i'll make sure all of them can make it. I know you'll be reading this, make sure you take good care of yourself there :P & recycle wont go on without you and i quit (: so we'll leave those two alone.

Lots of love from me to you <3

Ugly Truth

2010-12-14T14:35:00.000+08:00

Times flies, its already in the middle of december which means theres only 1/2 month more to school. I don't know if its me or what, but this year really pass through very fast :/ 2010, if you were to ask me how's 2010? Its the worst year ever, everything bad just seems to be happening this year, I've lost the one i love, the one im once so close to.. throughout everything i've learn alot, and even some ugly truth.. No matter what happens, life still goes on with or without you it just takes time for us to realise. Hope 2011 would be a better year, a brand new start.

2010-12-06T23:41:00.000+08:00

Pinkalicious

People please feel free to take a look at it (:

its an online shop

start shopping for new year clothes !

and guys, its time to get christmas presents (:

2010-12-05T02:36:00.000+08:00

Sometimes it really makes me wonder, why do some people don't feel ashame of being a third party. Don't they feel guilty? Or atleast feeling a little bad/sorry deep deep down in there? Some people tend to take it as an enjoyment, an exicitement. To me its just an immoral thing to do, i look down on these people especially those who don't feel sorry at all. Don't worry, karma will come one day.

Fyi, I'm never a kind person especially to that one person who offended me, so please watch your limits because i have my limits too. I have low tolerance for people like you.

It made me who i am right now

2010-12-02T20:30:00.003+08:00

Sometimes i'm thankful for all the mistakes and wrong choices I've made in my life,
I am grateful for all the heartbreaks and for the times i cried,
I appreciate the disappointments and failures I had in my life..
Because, now..I realised that every single pain and tears I've felt and spilled,
led me to where I am now..and I know, it made me stronger..
It made me better, hopefully soon, happier.

I'm tired

2010-11-29T23:23:00.003+08:00

My pink polka dot nails ♥

Walking around with these glossy eyes. "I'm just tired," I say. But you know what? It's bullshit. Yes, I'm tired, but it's not all from lack of sleep. I'm tired of waking up with nothing to look forward to, tired of going to bed exhaused after doing a million things i find no enjoyment in doing. I'm tired of this void, this emptiness that looms over me even though my days are packed. I'm tired of the loneliness that presses down on me even though I'm surrounded by dozens of people. So why can't i just say it? Humans are so afraid to look into each other's eyes and say "I am unhappy, I am broken, I am hopeless and fallible." I've been conditioned to associate pain with weakness, sadness with coldness, loneliness with unworthiness, difference with disease, as if these feelings are contagious, as if ambivalence is something not to be felt but to be feared. Well, I say screw all of that. Screw forced smiles and polite handshakes and I'm fine, thank yous. Screw the fear of crying in public place, the fake chipper voice, the lies, we spit out to cover up our problemes. We are humans. We are meant to feel. To feel everything and to feel it all openly. We are not metal - we are flesh and bone. Our boiled blood courses through our cold, clammy hands. We are intricate and beautiful and we should never hide our human parts, because if we do, then what's left to show?

27th

2010-11-28T01:23:00.001+08:00

27.11.2010

26.9.2010

last picture taken on the 26th of september

Its been two months since she left us

I still miss her alot :/

Everything happened on the 26/9-27/9 kept repeating in my mind

every single feeling

the night we met that weird guy

having roti tisu in mamak

candles

the moment she said bye

that moment her bro told me ~~she passed away~~

i remember it was a rainy day

i told myself, i wouldnt believe it til i see it with my own eyes

seeing her, the one who's always loud

the one who cant stay quiet

the one who doesnt like to be lonely

lying in there with her eyes close

its really heartbreaking

Qi, remember the song you like ?

Just A Dream

It was on the radio more than 4 times today

i really do hope all this are just a dream

a nightmare

i miss gossiping moments with you

i promise, you'll always be in our hearts

and like what you told me

i'll stay strong (:

love you.

Island trip

2010-11-28T01:10:00.000+08:00

25/11-27/11 Marina Island & Pangkor Island

Back from my 3 day 2 nights island trip

its oh-so-boring there

plus you can barely find internet there

& they dont even have a proper shopping mall to shop at o.o

now i feel lucky staying in kl instead of those places

if i were to stay there..i couldnt imagine how am i gonna survive there

theres not much to write bout the trip

so i guess i'll stop here (:

Happy thankgiving

2010-11-25T23:20:00.001+08:00

If I'm not mistaken, it's thanksgiving today :D
I’m thankful for having the opportunity to list down everything I feel thankful about.
I’m very thankful for alot of things.
So I guess I’ll just put it in bullet forms.
• I'm thankful for having my parents who loves me alot :) <3
• I'm thankful for having all my friends by my side when I'm in need *you know who you are* (;
• I'm thankful for meeting her, Ng Zhi Qi
• I'm thankful that I never have to go through things alone
• I actually feel thankful for meeting everyone of you (:

FYI, I'm currently stuck on some island I barely able to find Internet, so..Im thankful for the Internet service too lol.

Get a life...

2010-11-21T01:01:00.000+08:00

~~Bitch~~ you're getting on my nerves
One more time I caught you staring I swear I'll yell at you.

super long update

2010-11-17T13:07:00.002+08:00

12th of november

It's Ee Quan's Birthday !

we had her birthday dinner at Sunway Giza, Fullhouse

i guess its counted as a okay night

except the fact that we bought her a chocolate cheese cake

was just a simple dinner

but i'm sure everyone had fun (:

For Qi

look its rtg members !

we never forget bout you

just like the picture

you'll always be in our hearts <3

13th of november

This time, last year everything was so different

we were having our class party

it was our big day

it was the day we spend most time together

and as for this year

she left

and this date..doesnt bring a smile to my face anymore

but instead tears..

1004days, full stop

although im still not as strong as people think i should be,

but atleast im stronger than who i was.

14th of november

its the 48th day she left us

today we celebrated her life

who's her ?

our beloved friend, Ng Zhi Qi

i'm sure she was there with us

and im sure she enjoyed the performances

and our..choir lol

it was a last minute thing so its kinda cacat

although it was raining heavily

and alot of them couldnt make it

it still went well

the shirt we made :D

Zhi Qi, all eyes are on you now (:

If you ever find yourself lost and all alone,

get back on your feet and think of us,

our love will get you home,

Qi our love will get you home.

15th of november

3 years ago

i remember us 4 were spending our time in class

talking bout ghost stories, screaming like no ones business

3 years after this day, everythings so different :/

16th of november

its suppose to be shopping day

but with those guys and some money issues

we never did much shopping today

but instead bowling and pool

Bff :D

thanks for the memories

2010-11-09T22:59:00.000+08:00

Its you again coming into my mind
watching slideshows of yours brought back lots of memories
good old ones and also some regretful ones
no words could express how i feel other than tears
i guess thats why they say tears are words that the heart couldnt express
thinking back at those silly and childish us
we goes to the toilet alot, as in A-L-O-T
and school toilets are lousy..some doors cant be lock
so we came up with this brilliant plan to steal the lock out
and keep it for our own use whenever we want to go
&whenever i think of you, the line 'dare anot' always appears
cause thats what you always say to me

Qi, its your party this coming sunday
to celebrate your life..hope you'll enjoy everything we've prepared for you (:

I'm afraid :/

2010-11-09T00:23:00.001+08:00

I’m afraid of this going away. I’m afraid of getting hurt. I’m afraid of giving in more than I know I should. I’m afraid of trusting too much. I’m afraid of being taken advantage of. I’m afraid of this turning out to be a sad ending again. I'm afraid of finding out someone i thought i knew best turning to be someone i didnt know at all. I'm afraid of losing someone important to me. I'm afraid of being replaced. I’m afraid of waking up one morning and things will be completely different. I’m scared that I feel this way, that I’m afraid.

Maybe its just that i'm afraid of things ending up the same again.

2010-11-07T15:57:00.000+08:00

When she looked away,

you didn’t see the tears,

Nor the smile that faded.

You didn’t see the pain she’s feeling,

You don’t see the pain she’s dealing with.

Why are you so blind?

You played with her heart and messed with her mind.

Boy you’ve got no heart,

you just tear other’s apart.

You say you’re sorry,

you say not to worry,

you won’t hurt her over again.

Too bad boy, it’s the end.

Once was enough,

And now you want her? Tough.

Halloween Party

2010-11-04T01:08:00.000+08:00

Finally its the last day of exam !

after so long i've been waiting for

attended Jazz's halloween party today

its was great and fun :D

how i wish i could be free from my braces for that moment

braces+smile=weird

maybe not for everyone

but atleast me :/

haha but i still had kinda lot of pictures today

hope to get the pictures asap !

next post might be about the taylors charity dinner jean invited me to (:

stay tuned <3

Shopping spree

2010-10-30T20:35:00.000+08:00

After two long torturest week of exams i'm finally one step nearer to freedom :D

Shopping was great today

shopping for 8 hours from ou to curve (:

and now i got more options for my halloween outfit

rich man's wife / bunny / angel / clubbing girl

haha which to pick ?! its so so hard :/

after one whole day of shopping im exhausted

but ofcourse its worth it (:

can't wait til exams finally over

and wednesday ! party all night

guess next post would be the halloween wish/halloween party on wednesday

stay tuned :)

Shopping list :
~~Flats~~
~~Heels~~ x2
~~Mini Dress~~
~~White nail art~~
~~Hair accessories~~ x2
~~Necklace~~

I enjoy shopping with my girls more than dating .

Trust no one, not even the closest one

2010-10-21T14:57:00.003+08:00

the truth always do hurt

but if theres a choice for me

i'll choose to be hurt by the truth than hearing all those lies

pinky promises, those " I will's " & " I won'ts " are nothing but a beutiful lie

people say the biggeset lie they've ever heard is 'I will love you forever'

but to me..its 'I promise not to lie bout anything'

if you know you cant do it, pls do not promise

& every girl wants to be their guys one and only

why not choose being loyal to one than hurting both at the same time ?

not being honest is already not forgivable but being greedy is worst

please make up your mind before doing anything

heartbroken won't kill so dont worry

you wont need anyone who doesnt need you

so guys, before making any girls fall for you

please make sure you can be loyal otherwise don't waste your time and her love

stop assuming that you know what im feeling

2010-10-20T14:39:00.002+08:00

Its exam week :/

tiring+torturing+everything negative

its just the 3rd day but it felt like 3 weeks D:

Zhi Qi, i wrote bout you in my english essay yesterday :P

maybe it wasnt that good..cause i really couldnt express it well with words

so pls forgive me !

okay lets just talk about my 'after-exams-party-plan' (:

ming ajak me to join him for genting the week after exams

its like we plan since form1 and failed everytime

dont know if we could make it this time..

but i really do hope to go with *her just like we've plan :/

but before that i need ways to get $$

its never enough for me maybe because i always shop til i drop..

and im also looking forward for jazz's halloween party :D

angel or devil ? i dont know which to pick

someone help me out pls :/

i was just another promise you couldnt keep

i'm back :D

2010-10-17T22:28:00.001+08:00

I'm back with my bloggging mood people :D

I guess i've been leaving this blog real dead for quite some time

What made me started blogging again ?

Its her, Ng Zhi Qi <3

Her death really taught me many many things i've not realise

She taught me heartbroken isnt that big deal anyway..

We still have a life..something more valuable than anything we might lost

And also..life is short..we dont know where will it end

So live life to the fullest..yea this phrase/quote might be really common

But i only understand the real meaning behind it after her death

Hope i could write bout everything i went through here

Cause who knows one day this would be the only thing left behind ?

Lol okay, maybe i just wanna look back at all this one day..

And not letting those memorable things to be erase as times goes by

Its the first day of exam tomorrow, i guess everyone are super duper stress bout it

But for once, like seriously for the first time..i do not feel stressed up at all

But the other way round..im just gonna cross my fingers and pray hard hard that i would just pass

Zhi Qi, you used to text me the night before exam wishing me good luck

You better do it in dreams tonite :P

xoxo

❤ ❤ ❤

2010-05-08T22:45:00.000+08:00

If something bad happens to us someday,

it'll never change what we have now, what we've always had .

Because you were right - love is real and we have to do everything to keep it alive.

Wherever life takes us, i want it to be with you,

forever or until tomorrow .

Life isnt easy ;

2010-01-27T21:02:00.004+08:00

have been busy with school lately

homeworks homeworks and more homeworks :l

isnt form4 a honey moon year ?

*skip that part*

&&
i've realise that you'll never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have

__________________________________

valentines on first day of chinese new year ?

& our big day on chinese new year eve

even how tough will it be, i promise to go through it with you .

2010-01-01T23:34:00.000+08:00

Happy New year ppl (:

will update soon .

Resolutions '09

2009-12-29T23:02:00.001+08:00

new year resolutions '09

~~study hard & get better results~~

~~be more patient~~

put on more weight

~~more hard~~working

~~indepe~~ndent

Christmas ; Results

2009-12-25T15:18:00.004+08:00

Grabbed from hr

Merry Christmas ppl (:

its christmas but idk why i just do not have that *christmas mood* but currently still on the results mood & sick mood -.-

&& congrats to those who have gotten good results you guys deserve it (:

& to ~~him~~, i'm proud of you (:

just a short update, dont expect much from me, i do not update much .

Satisfied with the results <3

2009-12-14T00:14:00.002+08:00

Team Edward ; Team Jacob

2009-12-05T13:45:00.000+08:00

CLICK HERE !

I want the team Edward bottle !

New Moon ; Edward Cullen

2009-11-30T14:14:00.009+08:00

Watch new moon the other day,

bought the 2nd row seat cause no choice

I was desperate to watch it.

&& i'm still Edward Cullen's fan !

gonna watch it again with Daniella when she's back from sibu (:

oh ya, ppl click here and check it out

fyi,

I can't wait for my results lol

even though it might not be what i've expected, but still x)

Countdowns :

Christmas-25days

Results-28days*not sure

Back to school-35days

2y24m731d-75days

&& a.l.a -656days

I hate it when i get my hopes up and comes crashing down .

2009-04-24T17:24:00.002+08:00

you're always the perfect one for me,

i love you, really, no matter what.

no matter how many times we argued,

and no matter what we're going to go through,

i will still be there for you..

what i've promised might sound like some little meaningless words to you,

but for me, they're all truth from the deep part of my heart.

like you said and what i believed,forever is exist between us,

and it's gonna happen on me and you.

i love you and i need you.i know i do, and always will,

with no regrets, no endings.

we had something beautiful,

and i know we gonna experience more
something even more pretty..
something even more lovely..
something even more hard..
something even more exciting..

2009-04-05T22:54:00.004+08:00

if something bad happens to us someday,
it'll never change what we have now,
what we have always had
because youre were right
love is real and we have to do everything to keep it alive
whereever life takes us,
i want it to be with you,
forever and always .

417 bby

missing you like crazy .

2009-03-27T22:34:00.004+08:00

after all is said and done,

i still think you`re amazing

i still cherish every moment

i spent with youu & every

smile youu brought to my face

i`ll forever be thankful that someone

like youu was brought into my life

even if it wouldn't last forever

see, youu were my miracle,

youu were

my fairy tale that i got to live.

408 bby .

happy v day

2009-02-14T23:15:00.002+08:00

happy valentines day

happy single awareness day

head over heels ❤

To love someone is to understand each other

to laugh together, to smile with ur heart

&to trust 1 another.

1 important thing is to let each other go if u cant do this.

One look
One smile
One touch
One embrace
One kiss
One love
Two people
Two minds
Two souls
Two destinies
One road
One journey
One ending
Together.

x♥x♥

you're my everything

2009-02-13T18:12:00.003+08:00

You are my everything

My heart and soulI thought I had dug my grave

But you pulled me out of that hole

When I am lost in the dark

You are my shinning light

You chase away the darkness

That haunts my dreams at night

You are my strength

That carries me to another tomorrow

You are my hope

That replaced my everlasting sorrow

You are my healer

That healed all my scars

You are my angel

Sent from the brightest of stars

When I thought there was nothing more

And my life was at an end

You came into my life

And my heart you did mend

You are my joy

That filled my empty heart

You made my life whole

When it was torn apart

When I found you

I was free from all torment

You are my angel

That was heaven sent

You mean so much to me

You are the only one I adore

You are my everything

I could ask for nothing more

I don't want empty words,

Or you to tell me lies.

*happy 1 year ann.*

one world

2009-02-03T21:41:00.007+08:00

30th of january

watch red cliff II kinda boring movie
but kinda funny at some parts while other people are enjoying their movie
im enjoying my food lol
- pop corns
-sandwich
-hot dog
-f&n strawberry
dinner for the day was

31th of january

lol kinda lazy to update but

- dinner in one world hotel
- we tersilap and went in the wrong room
- cup cakes
- old memories
- pictures !

mine was the one at the up left corner and the C

adriana = A
crystal = C

birthday wishes

2009-02-03T21:25:00.004+08:00

lol i know its kinda late but still atleast i wished

1st of feb.

happy birthday to Choo Jian Tatt & Lee Vin Sen

althought we're not that close anymore but..

everytime we see each other we still talk alot and ofcourse lol

we argue -.-

*currently finding a perfect pic of them lol *

choo jian tatt aka choo jam tart

lee vin sen aka durian head

2nd of feb

my mummy's birthday !

even thought we didnt really celebrate this year

i wanna wish my mum happy birthday and i love you .

i know you might not see this post but..still xP

red packets ;P

2009-01-26T16:25:00.000+08:00

happy cina baru nian !

to all readers

kinda busy lately

so wont really update

but not that i always update even im free lol

anywayss

this post is just to wish everyone of you

happy chinese new year~

8 things guys wish you knew

2009-01-26T16:20:00.000+08:00

stop thinking you're fat

Bear in mind that self-confidence and poise are so much sexier. Be bold, focus and flaunt what you have, show the boys that you’re more than meets the eye! Boys don’t like listening to your body insecurities. Start appreciating yourself as you are. Everyone is beautiful in their own way. Learn to love yourself, NOW. Have a healthy body image.

try not to be fickle

After making a decision, stick to it. Be confident and trust in the choice you make. If the decision is about which dress to wear to a party, don’t waste too much time changing your mind!

avoid gossiping

Gossiping—it just makes you look shallow and rude. When you do it too often, it might turn into a habit. Passing notes around, whispering, giggling... guys find them annoying. Guilty as charged? Just stop gossiping!

PMS is no excuse !

Cramps, a bloated stomach and fluctuating hormones leave you feeling all frustrated and moody. But barking at your sweetie just because you feel sick? Turn the table around. How would you feel if he did the same to you just because he wasn’t in the mood? Take care of his feelings, too. We feel your pain, we really do, but the fact is–don’t let it out on your boy.

mean what you say

Don’t we all say “Nothing” when it’s obvious that there IS something? A yes means yes, and a no means no. Try to open up to him about your feelings. Be honest. Communicate. Talk. Discuss. Stop trying to decode his words or actions. Just ask!

shop less

You can shop, certainly. But make sure you don’t overspend. Don’t shop like you’re Paris Hilton to keep up to a certain image. Try buying things you really need and really like. You can get fabulous clothes without having to spend a fortune, too!

we aren't mind readers

Of course, boys wish they have the power to read your mind. Reality check: they don’t. Try to keep things straight forward and simple. Boys don’t know what you like, where you want to go or what you want to do. Don’t make assumptions cuz guys, most times, don’t get the hint!

dont flirt

Smiling and being nice to strike a random conversation with a guy is alright, but heavy flirting with a guy just to get his attention is a big NO-NO. If you like him, let him know. If you're not into him, don't lead him on.

hmmm?

2009-01-18T19:16:00.000+08:00

hahahaha like i said...
arystal wont continue the crappy chat :D
hahaha...
guess shes been busy these few days.... -.-"
lol wateva la... :p
as usual im here to kacau stuff ^.^
lets juz say....

arystal is a clubber that is verrryyyy scaaredd of heights? >.<

eeeeeppppp.... ciao ciao XD lol

2009 ❤

2009-01-04T16:17:00.001+08:00

new year resolutions

study hard & get better results
be more patient
get a little more fat x)
be more hard working
try to be independent

erm lol
i think thats all

tag ;

2009-01-04T16:08:00.000+08:00

Do you think you're hot?
lol im hot but not hot*

Upload a favourite picture of yourself.

Do you like the picture?
-.-

When was the last time you ate pizza?
erm..lol im dont remember

What name do you prefer besides your name?
lol i love my name

5 people I tagged
kelvin
zhi wei
vincent
jazz
&& who ever that wanna do this tag

Who is number 1?
lol his zelvin

Who is number 3 having a relationship with?
=x

Say something about number 5.
lol that person is seriously bored / free

How about number 4?
his my pet bro he'll be there whenever i need him

Who is buddy number 2?
my another pet bro lol ?

christmas party

2008-12-27T21:50:00.000+08:00

woke up kinda early today

but ofcourse is worth it x)

so prepare & waited for jean

to come fetch me

after that went to jazz house for her party

lol so pai seh going without a present

cause i haven done with her present x)

*sorry lol i'll give u when school reopens

or either on the 2nd when we meet

got a box of sweets from jazz and mimi

lol im gonna get sugar rush

btw had lots of fun with them today

so..kinda tired now x)

let the picz do the talking

will post the othera when jazz send me =]

lol*fyi ming zhe

i dont go clubbing !

hope days pass faster

days without you .

continue... pls :D

2008-12-26T14:17:00.000+08:00

hmm... i dun really think crystal's gonna continue the crappy chat...
and crystal elmo is a smelly red puppet :p
that sings O.O
lol continue the chat le...
annndddd....
BARNEY have a better voice! XD
and fyi... crystal goes clubbing :P

lol ciao 1st.. ltr she scold me >.<

a short update

2008-12-25T12:57:00.000+08:00

merry christmas to you guys
whos reading lol
so long since i updated
my blog is being so dead
actually dont really have anything much to update
but lol
i just feel like updating
btw yip hann & ming zhe
elmo is seriously very cool

convo between me yip hann and ming zhe

arystal ! have you been good ?
lol ofcourse la im a very good girl =D
ya ya
ohh no wonder we dont get presents
*blur*
every nite crystal go nite club
santa saw this message & laughed to death
i dont go clubbing eh !
aiyo
ur fault la crystal
wait !
but how santa know ?
dont you know santa knows everything ?
HES A STALKER
night stalker

i'll update when im backk

213 ❤

2008-09-14T13:54:00.000+08:00

Chances are I'll never get a moment like this again,

so here's everything I ever wanted to tell you.

No one has ever gotten me like you.

I've never found anyone who makes me laugh like you.

You're the one person I can honestly see myself happy

The definition of love to me is you.

IFLU ❤
keep me in your heart, i promise i'll stay there forever .

06.07.08

2008-07-07T16:31:00.000+08:00

wasnt really a nice day

but had quite some fun =]

good news ?

2008-07-06T10:16:00.000+08:00

i get to go out later ;D
but kinda lied to my mum x)
but atleast i told her im going ou =]
will update when im back *

fill in the blanks =P

2008-07-05T09:50:00.000+08:00

lolx

seldom update nowadays x)

suppose to go out with zhi qi & all

tomorrow

but my dad said better not go

and blah blah blah -.-

but we planed so much

*baby bottle

and buffet !

& my dad went shanghai

so hopefully my mum will let x)

*crossing fingers*

______________________________________________

meet april ;)

143 ❤

updatee

2008-06-17T20:50:00.000+08:00

hahah

*wen qi im updating =P

today had injection in school

so pain x)

and now my hand is pain

and having bad flu

went pd during the holidayss

its was very fun =D

lolx

school's fine..

___________________

118*

<33

('@')

heheh

sweet memories between uss

xoxo

<33

2008-06-05T17:26:00.000+08:00

happy birthday !

*saguaa~

5.6.08

love you lots x)

*promises* =]

<33

hope you're always happy

smile alwayss =P

*sazhu~ =P

holidaaay

2008-05-29T15:12:00.000+08:00

happy holidays !

lolx

been very lazy nowadays x)

lazy to update

anywayss

happy early birthday to gan kien yi
=P

_________________________________

btw

holidays are boring =l

miss him so much x)

lolx ok

right now im hungry~ x)

some kuih thingy from singapore x)

-the end-

sweet memories between us

i heart you~

update

2008-05-20T21:23:00.000+08:00

heheh

long time didnt update d x)

been very lazy nowadays x)

exams so annoying =l

stayed up late last nite

to study stupid sciences =l

slept at 1am++

woke up this morning

so tired x)

cant even open my eyes big xP

so susah to wear my contacts lolx

anywayss

congrats to __________+___________ =P

hope you guys last long lor

and dont simply break again -.-

so excited for the genting/sunway lagoon trip x)

was talking so much bout genting today

talking bout the hotel rooms that we might be staying in x)

sangat takut of those thingyss & dead bodys under the bed xDD

and happy birthday kelvin !

sorry deleted the pic of urs x)

anywayss sorry didnt went to your party* the other day x))

hope you enjoy ur birthday =P

20.5.2008~

enjoy every single moment with you~

tears ?

2008-04-21T20:40:00.000+08:00

because of you i knew what love really is..

hearts you lots

i realized i can't live without you

p/s ~~im sorry ~~i didnt mean to not keep my promise~~~~

-l-o-s-t-

2008-04-20T22:13:00.000+08:00

i dont know what to believe in anymore

-f-a-k-e-p-e-o-p-l-e-s-

true / fake ? idk..

partyyy !

2008-04-06T10:35:00.000+08:00

woke up early =P
& wanted eat breakfast but phoness keep ringing
all phone calls & messages
lolx sangat sibuk x)
then got ready and stuff..
went pick up daniella & all lo
reach ou
meet everyone & alll say i late xD
then *hug* all of them cause so long didnt see d
went makan at some korean place
we makan sangat banyak lolx
ate from 1.30-4.30
ahaha none stop eating x)
took lots of picss =P
then made our own ice kacang =D
then went shopping
then 5.20 movie lo x)
d&a go bluff me they lost the tickets
scare me x)
*skip*
in cinema we sangat bising lolx
people all got mad..
*skip larh* all so boring xD
then went back home not feeling well =l
then *vomit* x)
anywayss
thanks for all the present =]
~adriana
~daniella
~danielle
~nicole
~kar yen
~lee yee
~hau run
~kelvin lim
~urmm some guy forgotten his name x)
~samuel
~kelvin lim ming chek

jam tart&jun bean still owe me =P

hearts u lots !

aprilfool ~

2008-04-01T20:38:00.000+08:00

happy aprilfool =P
guess what i didnt got fooled
eheheh

___________________

forever & forever ~
don't stop loving
<33

*countdown*
9 more days till my birthday =P
12 more days till our dayyy x)

happy 5th anniversary =P

2008-03-28T18:07:00.000+08:00

happy 5th anniversary~ b.f.f.a.c.l.d.j. !

*adrianaa~nanas-->the 6 years of friendship & still counting :D

dots

2008-03-22T22:25:00.000+08:00

...

thanks for the memories ! =]

2008-03-20T13:34:00.000+08:00

fcuking happy ! x)

2008-03-14T22:58:00.000+08:00

sangat

happy

secret between me and you =]

<33sss>

i wanna be the girl u'll love no matter what <3

finally out of the house =D

2008-03-11T22:00:00.000+08:00

happy holidayss =]

woke up at 8+ todayysurprisingly xP

get readyy and went out =D

watched step up 2

movie ok ok larh x)

then walked from ikano to bu2a

ka hau runs housee

sangat jauh !

walk walk walk nearly fell lots of time

end up daniella was the one who fall xD

then half way raining

so malang ehh..

whole body wet -.-

they suggest ask me take off my slippers -.-

and runnn lolx

but i didnt ahah i was like u all run larh

i walk behind x)

then end up xxx teman me walk hahah

then reach his house d lo

his grandmother gave us towel x)

*skip*

and im home xD

take care ! love youu

101 reasons why i love you =]

2008-03-10T18:10:00.000+08:00

I love the way we finish each other's sentences.
I love the way I know you'll never give up on me.
I love the fact that I wouldn't ever give up on you.
I love the way you look at me.
I love how beautiful your eyes are.
I love the way I can't imagine a day without you in my life.
I love the way if we were ever separated I wouldn't know how to go on.
I love the way we cuddle and watch sunsets together.
I love the way we sometimes stay up all night and just talk, then watch the sunrise together.
I love how I know you'll always be there when I need you to be.
I love the fact that I will always be there for you too.
I love how when I dream of my life partner, the only person that I can see is you.
I love how complete I feel when I am with you.
I love how our bodies just fit together.
I love the way you make me laugh.
I love the way you laugh.
I love the way you won't compromise yourself when we are together.
I love the way you won't let me compromise myself.
I love your thoughtfulness.
I love your tenderness.
I love your ability to speak without saying a single word.
I love the way we glance at each other across the room and know what each other is thinking.
I love the way, how even though we may be miles apart I still feel like you're right here with me.
I love the way you surprise me with the perfect gifts that show you pay attention to me.
I love the way you'll watch a sporting game with me even though you may not be interested in it.
I love the way you treat my friends.
I love your love for the things that interest me.
I love the way you let me live my life freely without jealousy.
I love how you demand respect but are not controlling.
I love how I would do anything in this world to make you happy.
I love how you would do anything in this world to make me happy.
I love the way your voice sounds over the phone.
I love the way your voice sounds when you whisper sweet nothings in my ear.
I love the completeness and oneness I feel when we make love.
I love your sensuality.
I love how our romance feels like the perfect romance movie.
I love how you are my soul mate.
I love the way you handle troubled times.
I love the way you respect me.
I love the way you protect and defend me.
I love how you feel when we cuddle.
I love the softness of your lips against mine.
I love the softness of you lips against my body.
I love the feeling of your hair brushing against me when we make love.
I love laying in bed at night talking about nothing.
I love waking up to find we've been cuddling together all night.
I love the surprises you leave for me.
I love your intelligence.
I love your ingenuity.
I love your ability to make friends where ever we go.
I love your love for life.
I love your passion for your hobbies and interests.
I love how every time I look at you, you take my breath away.
I love how I thank God everyday for bringing someone as wonderful as you into my life.
I love the fact you gave me the gift of our children.
I love the special moments that we shared that will remain my fondest memories of you and I.
I love spending the holidays with the one person I love the most.
I love how my heart skips a beat whenever you walk into the room.
I love how you love me.
I love how I love you.
I love the ways you choose to show your affection for me.
I love the way you inspire me to be more than I am.
I love the way you spark my creativity and imagination.
I love the way you make me feel like anything is possible as long as I'm with you.
I love your sense of humor.
I love the way you make me feel like royalty.
I love the way you dress.
I love your understated elegance.
I love you just the way you are.
I love your spontaneity.
I love our life together.
I love how if I died right now I would be the happiest person alive knowing I found my one true love.
I love the fact that we will grow old together.
I love your way with words.
I love the way you look when your sleeping.
I love the way you think you look awful when you first wake up when it is actually then I find you the most beautiful.
I love your willingness to share everything and most especially your heart with me.
I love your strength of character.
I love taking showers together.
I love the way you leave me love notes to find whenever you're gone.
I love the way you treat me.
I love the way you take care of us.
I love your cooking.
I love the way you take the time to thank me for doing every day things.
I love the way you show your affection when we are around friends and/or family.
I love the way you are not scared to show your affection when we are in public.
I love your confidence.
I love your ability to make me feel better when times are tough.
I love the way we make up after a fight.
I love how you treat our children.
I love the way you support me when I'm off track.
I love the way you take the time to show me how much you love me.
I love your beautiful hair.
I love your body.
I love your openness to try new things.
I love your ability to talk things through.
I love your courage to be you.
I love your greatness.
I love the fact that you want to be with me and only me.
I love how I am and feel when I am with you!
I love you for you!

updatee ! x)

2008-03-02T22:13:00.000+08:00

lol almost a month didnt update lolx x)

btw exam coming lolx

goodluck everyone ! =P

lol malas nak blog d

lolx and got nothing to blog about..

i'll blog soon =P

dont miss me too much =)

happy cina baru nian ! =]

2008-02-07T23:53:00.000+08:00

wheeeeeee its cny again x)

ang paus ang pauss =]]

slept at 2+3 last nite lolx

so freaking tired and woke up at ermm 9+10 ?

lol then curi curi wash my hair and quickly dry it ahaha

cannot let my grandma know later she marah me

x) so then went makan breakfast

then suddenly a indian woman with 2 kids came outside my house

she wanted us to donate some money clothes and food -.-

then i went and tell my mum

then my mum sangat kind she gave them ang paus then gave them food and drinks x)

*skiipp*

then around 4+ half way smsing on the sofa while waiting for the sms

i fell asleep x)

then wake up d.. my dads cousin came

her daughter aka my cousin ? lol was so

freaking cute ! x)

shes cute rite ?! x)

then after that banyak orang datang x)

then makan tukar went visiting..

nothing special lol

and then come back count my ang paus and blog! x)

lol ermm ok i'll blog when im feel lol

<33's

read ! x)

2008-02-05T14:02:00.000+08:00

lazy to blog so just post this story 1st x) xD =x
i'll blog sooonnn lolx

the dolls of love <3

I have a boyfriend who grew up with me. His name is Jin. I always thought of him as a friend until last year, when we went to a trip from a club. I found that I fell in love with him.
Before that trip was over, I took a step and confessed my love for him. And soon, we became a pair of lovers, but we loved each other in different ways. I always concentrated on him only, but by his side, there were so many other girls. To me, he was the only one, but to him, maybe I was just another girl…
“Jin, do you want to go watch a movie?” I asked.
“I can’t”
“Why? You need to study at home?” I felt disappointment
grabbing me.
“No… I am going to meet a friend…”
He was always like that. He met girls in front of me, like it was nothing. To him, I was just a girlfriend. The word ‘love’ only came out from my mouth. Since I knew him, I had never heard him say ‘I love you’ before. To us, there weren’t any anniversaries at all.
He didn’t say anything from the first day and it continued till 100 days…200days… Everyday, before we say goodbye, he would just hand me a doll, everyday, without fail. I don’t know why…
Then one day…
Me: Um, Jin, I …
Jin: What…don’t drag, just say..
Me: I love you.
Jin: ……you….um, just take this doll and go home.
That was how he ignored my ‘three words’ and handed me the doll. Then he disappeared, like he was running away. The dolls I received from him everyday, filled my room, one by one. There were many…
Then one day came, my 15th year old birthday. When I got up in the morning, I pictured a party with him, and stranded myself in my room, waiting for his call. But… lunch passed, dinner passed… and soon the sky was dark… he still didn’t call. It was already tiring to look at the phone anymore. Then around 2am in the morning, he suddenly called me and woke me from my sleep. He told me to come out of the house. Still, I felt joy and I ran out happily.
Me: Jin…
Jin: Here…take this…
Again, he handed me a little doll.
Me: What’s this?
Jin: I didn’t give it to you yesterday, so I am giving it to you now. I’m going home now, bye.
Me: Wait, wait! Do you know what today is?
Jin: Today? Huh?
I felt so sad, I thought he would remember my birthday. He turned around and walked away like nothing had happen.Then I shouted… “Wait…”
Jin: You have something to say?
Me: Tell me, tell me you love me…
Jin: What?!
Me: Tell me
I put my pathetic self behind and clung on to him. But he just said simple cold words and left.
“I don’t want to say…that I love someone so easily, if you are desperate to hear it, then find someone else.”
That was what he said. Then he ran off. My legs felt numb… and I collapsed to the ground. He didn’t want to say it easily… How could he…. I felt that… Maybe he is not the right guy for me…
After that day, I stranded myself at home crying, just crying. He didn’t call me, although I was waiting. He just continued handing me a little doll every morning outside my house. That’s how those dolls piled up in my room… everyday
After a month, I got myself together and went to school. But what made the pain resurface was that… I saw him on a street… with another girl… He had a smile on his face, one that he never showed me…as he touched the doll… I ran straight back home and looked at the dolls in my room, and tears fell… Why did he gave these to me… Those dolls are probably picked out by some other girls…In a fit of anger, I threw the dolls around. Then suddenly, the phone rang. It was him.
He told me to come out to the bus stop outside my house. I tried to calm myself down and walked to the bus stop. I kept reminding myself that I am going to forget him, that… it’s going to end. Then he came into my sight, holding a big doll.
Jin: Jo, I thought you were pissed, you really came?
I couldn’t help hating him, acting like nothing had happen and joking around. Soon, he held out the doll as usual…
Me: I don’t need it.
Jin: What….why…
I grabbed the doll from his hands and threw it on the road.
Me: I don’t need this doll, I don’t need it anymore!! I don’t want to see a person like you again!
I spitted out all the words that were inside me. But unlike other days, his eyes very shaking.
“I’m sorry”
He apologized in a tiny voice.
He then walked over to the road to pick up the doll…
Me: You stupid! Why are you picking up the doll?! Just throw it away!!!
But he ignored me and just went to pick the doll. Then…
Honk~ Honk~
With a loud honk, a big truck was heading towards him.
“Jin! Move! Move away!” I shouted…
But he didn’t hear me, he squatted down and picked up the doll.
“Jin, move!”
HONK~!!
“Boom!” That sound, so terrifying.
That’s how he went away from me.
That’s how he went away without even opening his eyes to say one word to me.
After that day, I had to go through everyday with guiltiness and the sadness of losing him… And after spending two months like a crazy person… I took out the dolls.
Those were the only gifts he left me since the day we started going out. I remembered the days I spent with him and started to count the days… when we were in love…
“One…two… three…”
That was how… I started to count the dolls…
“Four hundred and eighty four… four hundred and eighty
five…”
It all ended with 485 dolls.
I then started to cry again, with a doll in my arms. I hugged it tightly, then suddenly…
“I love you~, I love you~”
I dropped the dolls,shocked.
“I….lo..ve…you??”
I picked up the dolls and pressed its stomach.
“I love you~ I love you~”
It can’t be! I pressed all the dolls’ stomach as it piled on the side.
“I love you~”
“I love you~”
“I love you~”
Those words came out non-stop. I…love you… Why didn’t I realize that….That his heart was always by my side, protecting me. Why didn’t I realize that he love me this much… I took out the doll under the bed and pressed it’s stomach,
that was the last doll, the one that fell on the road. It had his blood stain on it. The voice came out, the on that I was missing so much…
“Jo…Do you know what today is? We’ve been loving each other for 486 days. Do you know what 486 is? I couldn’t say I love you…. Um… since I was too shy… If you forgive me and take this doll, I will say that I love you… everyday… till I die… Jo… I love you…”
The tears came flowing out of me. Why? Why? I asked god, why do I only know about all this now? He can’t be by my side, but he loved me until his last minute…
For that… and for that reason… to me… it became courage… to live a beautiful life….

the salty coffee. sweet <3

2008-02-01T19:14:00.000+08:00

The Salty Coffee

He met her on a party, she was so outstanding, many guys chasing after her,while he was so normal, nobody paid attention to him. At the end of the party, he invited her to have coffee with him, she was surprised, but due to politeness, she promised. They sat in a nice coffee shop, he was too nervous to say anything, she felt uncomfortable, she thought, please, let me back home. Suddenly he asked the waiter: would you please give me some salt? I'd like to put it in my coffee.

Everybody stared at him, so strange! His face turned red, but, still, he put the salt in his coffee and drank it. She asked him curiously: why you have this hobby? He replied: when I was a little boy, I was living near the sea, I like playing in the sea, I could felt the taste of the sea, salty and bite, just like the taste of the salty coffee. Now every time I have the salty coffee, I will think of my childhood, think of my hometown, I miss my hometown so much, I miss my parents who still living there. Saying that, tears filled his eyes. She was deeply touched. That's his true feeling, from the bottom of his heart.

"A man who can tell out his homesick, he must be a man loves home, cares about home, has responsibility of home," she thought. Then she also started to talk, talked about her faraway hometown, her childhood, her family. That was a really nice talk, also a beautiful beginning of their story. They continue to date. She found actually he was a man who meets all her demands: he was tolerance, kind hearted, warm, careful...he was such a good guy but she almost missed him! Thanks to his salty coffee!

Then the story was just like every beautiful love story: the princess married to the prince, then they were living the happy life...And, every time she made coffee for him, she put some salt in the coffee, as she knew that's the way he liked.

After 40 years, he passed away, left her a letter which said: "My dearest, please forgive me, forgive my whole life lie. This was the only lie I said to you, the salty coffee. Remember the first time we dated? I was so nervous at that time, actually I wanted some sugar, but I said salt. It's hard for me to change so I just go ahead. I never thought that could be the start of our communication! I tried to tell you the truth many times in my life, but I was too afraid to do that, as I have promised not to lie to you for anything..

Now I'm dying, I afraid of nothing so I tell you the truth: I don't like the salty coffee, what a strange bad taste..but I have the salty coffee for my whole life since I knew you, I never feel sorry for anything I do for you. Having you with me is my biggest happiness for my whole life. If I can live for the second time, I still want to know you and have you as my whole life wife, even though I have to drink the salty coffee again."

Her tears made the letter totally wet. Someday, someone asked her: What's the taste of salty coffee?

It's sweet. She replied.

boys = complicated

2008-02-01T14:11:00.000+08:00

Guys hate sluts even thoughtheyhave sex with them!(oh yeah..you're not "popular" ifyou've slept with more than 6guys..you're a HOE)-

-Guys may be flirting around all daybut before they go to sleep, theyalways think about the girl they trulycare about.-

-Guys go crazy over a girl's smile.-

-Guys will do anything just to getyou to notice him-

Guys hate it when you talk aboutyour ex-boyfriend or ex love-interest.-

-Boyfriends need to be reassuredoften that they're still loved.-

-Don't talk about your guy friends toyour boyfriend.-

-Guys get jealous easily.-

-Guys are more emotional than they'dlike people to think.-

-Giving a guy a hanging messagelike "You knowwhat?!..uh...nevermind.." would makehim jump to a conclusion that is farfrom what you are thinking. And he'llassume he did something wrong and he'll obsess about it trying to figureit out.-

-Guys are good flatterers whencourting but they usually stammer whenthey talk to a girl they really like.-

-A usual act that proves that the guylikes you is when he teases you.-

-Guys love you more than you lovethem if they are serious in yourrelationships.-

-Guys think WAY too much. One smallthing a girl does, even if she doesn'tnotice it can make the guy think aboutit for hours, trying to figure outwhat it meant.-

-Guys seek for advice from girls notother guys. Because most guys thinkalike, so if one guy's confused, thenwe're all confused.-

-When a guy asks you to leave himalone, he's just actuallysaying, "Please come and listen to me."-

-If a guy starts to talk seriously,listen to him. It doesn't happen thatoften, so when it does, you knowsomething's up.-

-If your best guy friend seems toavoid you or is never around whenyou're with your boyfriend, he'sprobably jealous and likes you.-

-When a guy tells you that you arebeautiful, don't say you aren't. Itmakes them want to stop telling youbecause they don't want you todisagree with them.-

-When a guy looks at you for longerthan a second, he's definitelythinking something.-

-Guys don't like girls who punchharder than they do.-

-A guy has more problems than you cansee with your naked eyes.-

-Don't be a snob. Guys can beintimidated and give up easily.-

-Guys talk about girls more thangirls talk about guys.-

-Guys hate rejection, but they hatebeing led on even more.-

-If you are going to reject a guy,just do it. Don't say they are like abrother or just good friends, it justhurts even more. Tell them that youaren't interested in a relationshipand they will respect you.-

-Guys really think that girls arestrange and have unpredictabledecisions and are MAD confusing butsomehow are drawn even more to them.-

-When a guy sacrifices his sleep andhealth just to be with you, he reallylikes you and wants to be with you asmuch as possible.

happy happy fun fun day lol ♥

2008-01-23T21:39:00.000+08:00

yesterday made alarm at 8.45
lol and end up the alarm didnt ring -.-
cause i made it at pm instead of am -.-
lol then quickly wake up and shower..
took so long to choose my cloths so end up forgot to wear my contacts x)
then went ou..
bought *mb's present
meet him..
as usual hr&all are late -.-
lunch *pizza so freaking cheesy
then went shopping bought 2 shirts x)
movie *mad money / money mad lol
its so retarted -.-
saw lots of people as in people i know lol
old friends
jazz&zhi qi went ou but didnt see any of them
took lots of pic x)

** wanna get that stupid jacket from forever 21 =l

schools fun =]

2008-01-20T21:30:00.000+08:00

ahahah long time since i post x)

miss me ? lolx

guess what i went to school yesterday =]

so hardworking rite?xD

lol we had roadrun & it was fun surprizingly xD

ok lazy to type lol post tomorrow

i guess the picz told everything x)

ahaha

random ♥

2008-01-14T00:40:00.000+08:00

baby tell me you love me 1 last time ♥
i ♥ him
tell her you love her =]
no matter how busy i am when u come through my mind a smile comes to my face =]

its 12+1 and im on the com

1st time lol on a school day i curi com online..

but i seriously cant sleep =

and im so hyper now lol

and im like acting so crazy ahaha

even hr was freak out..

im like so tired but semangat ishh

dunno how to explain lar =/

______________

wishlist
♥

a big big teddy bear on valentines =)

lots of lots of clothes x)

good results ahaha

thats it i guess lol

yea shes smiling outside but inside shes dying
2008-01-12T15:38:00.000+08:00

i want to be remembered as the girl who smiles even thouh her heart is broken&the 1 who can always brighten up your day even if she couldnt brighten her own

___________________________________________

pls dont tell me not to cry
pls dont say there was a reason why
you dont know what i am feeling
or how much i hurt
the wet spots are from tears on the collar of this shirt
you think i should go on with life?
forget about it and be strong..
but deep down i am sad and i dont want to go along
i dont expect you to understand why
for no apparent reason i break down and start to cry
my life has changed forever you see
and thats why i am not acting like the same old me
so pls dont try to act like nothing happened
because its changed my life forever
i will never be the same again
not today not tomorrow but never
the best thing you can do for me is just be there
just like always my friend..
my broken heart is hurting badly
and it will never mend..

you drive me crazy but i love the way u do it <3

2008-01-12T13:13:00.000+08:00

schools kinda fun nowadays lol

must enjoy while i still can lol

cause i decide wanna change school..

dunno if its a right decisian x)

but hope i dont regret ahaha..

must start studying harder..

cause wanna get straight a's for pmr =]

i no it sounds kinda impossible

but i'll try my best lol

___________________________________

Why isn't love ever enough?

Like, why do other things matter so much?

You know, all the hiding your real feelings & sneaking around.

Just so people don't get hurt when all you want to do is just be in love.

1st day of school..

2008-01-06T13:10:00.000+08:00

slept at 11 *surprizingly =]
but woke up at 1 =l
cant sleep so went and kacau my bro lol
and play with my phone and stuff
till 3++4 only can sleep charm eh..
then 6+woke up d..
prepare for school
and zoom~ reach school d lol
walk walk walk like a lost kid x)
then walk up the stairs and jean was kinda like
running after me lol
cause i didnt see her x)
then we walked up to class together&found our class
and we sat and the same place as last eyar =]
and we were in the same block same class
and same classmates so to be
it feels like form1 lol
then went perhimpunan boring like shyt as usual -.-
saw form1's lol
was a normal day
and our stupid guru thingkatan sucks -.-
she dont let girls be any of those ketua&stuff
only boys can be -.-
but who cares =P
and im the penolong for chinese -.-
then we all sit the whole row lol
geng eh ?
xD
then go back home d lor...

pictures 31&1 =] =) =D

2008-01-06T12:45:00.000+08:00

loliess
in the meeting room =]31stof dec
chik chak =]
on the rooftop x)

walking up the scary stairs to the ro
they&hyper are like peanut butter&jellys(you can see byurself)x)

nanas with ellas middle finger x)&crys peace lol

happy 2008 =]
our silly moment =x
yeah we laugh way too hard, act too immature, but i wouldnt have it any other way <3 href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_EM8J8x3_p18/R4BfV6PTC4I/AAAAAAAAABI/vicZFEnwI0A/s1600-h/Photo+194.jpg"> =]
best friends forever*weirdos*freakos again x)

we had lots of fun together =]

2008-01-02T14:41:00.000+08:00

31.12.2007

went to adrianas house with daniella
waited for adriana forawhile cause haven back from tuition..
then when shes back we played sims2 forawhile
then we went to her dads office
her dads office is so cool =] =) =D
1st we camwhore with her *mad aka mac lol
then we check out the toilet xD x) xP
got a big big big mirror so we stay in the toilet for quite sometime
&take lots of picz =P
then we watch im a legend sambil makan mini orang =]
it was kinda like urmm scary?
lol we screaamm x)
then after that we talk talk talk and makan..
its like nite d..
then we went out for dinner
shopping *abit lol
then went back was like 10 i guess
then we went up and down with the lift lol
then we went to the highest floor aka 24
and it was freaking scary lol
we were the only one there
and its like so so scary lol
we went to the toilet and the hand dryer thingy turn on and we scream and run x)
haha then we like play play&play

then we to the rooftop there
the stairs freaking scary !
its so so so scary xD
and went on the rooftop its scary too
cause im affaird of highs lol
then we start messaging
and countdown!
10!9!8!7!6!5!4!3!2!1!
merdeka!
lol
its actually happy new year lol
ahahah

we were so excited keep taking picz and watch the fireworks
wheeeeeeeeeeeee
happy happy fun fun day =D
then went down talk and sing !
we made a song =DD

pincy-by adriana crystal daniella

i pincy u
u pincy me
we pincy each other
oh very pain painpain!
whoo very pain painpain!
whooo very pain painpain!
word........
dork..!

hahaha xD
i no its so immature but its fun =]

and then we went to the lift
and we went out the wrong level..-.-
then went back in and daniella went out again&walk walk walk till we laugh like mad
only she come back in lol
hahhaha
then went in car
zoommm --->reach her house fast eh ? =]
then we like mandi tukar and then sims2
com talk sing record gb elmo
and its already 4+
haha then we went down to have a late late supper
and its 5+
then went up talk talk gb!
and adriana fall asleep =] =) =D
then we put toothpaste on her leg
haha cause we said who sleep 1st we'll put x)
then she woke up cause it was like so cold haha
then she went and sleep again -.- (7+am)
then me&daniella continue gb =D =) =}
we're accdited to that game
then suddenly i feel so so so sleepy&i told daniella
im just gonna close my eyes k?
i'll not be asleep u can still talk to me LOL
then she was like err okk....?
then i fell asleep -.-
then after 5mins. she went to sleep too
we leave the laptop on till morning lol
then suddenly 10+ hr call then talk forawhile then continue sleep!
till 1 we heard negaraku song wth -.-
then i woke up and everyone woke up
and it was her dad lol
its already 1 ask us to go get our lunch
haha and adriana was dreaming people singing negaraku LOL
&daniella she though she was in dataran merdeka -.-
then went lunch
then talk talk picz
then talk
gb com elmo
sims2
then we went mandi&choose baju and stuff
till 4.30
only we leave the house to ou&meet them
then went for movie
after movie buh-bye
didnt go to hr's bbq =/
then went adrianas house around 10.30 only went home
finally home sweet home =D =] =)
and slept at 4 -.-

missing yesterday

2008-01-01T20:24:00.000+08:00

The firsts of 2008 =)

first thing you did-

scream my lungs out

First person i talked to-

Daniella & Adriana =)

First thing i ate-

mini oranges

First thing i drank-

Coke baby!

First song i heard-

Daniella and martin's weeding song -.-

First song i sang-

The 'pincy' song =p

The first sms i got-

frm Hau Run

The first phone call-

Frm Hau Run again -.-

Who did you wish you were with at the stroke of midnight?

Him.

truth or dare?=]

2007-12-29T00:21:00.000+08:00

alarm rang on 10

aha but a lazy pig like me wouldnt wake up lol

so after the alarm ring again have to wake up d

or else i'll be late

ahaa

then woke up try call daniella

and ask wat time shes picking me

but cant get her

till 12+ also =/

its like she went far far away from town

her phone got problem cant get her

so called her house lots of time

i think the bro is mad at me lol xD

then 12++1

lee yee*lucky star x)

fetch me

went to club and cari those blur case* boys lol

aka

hau run jian tatt jun xiong ming chek

then went and have a drink

they went swimming

we throw jx's pants in the pool =)

haha the boys swim but we didnt..

then makan..

they change..

then we played at the playground x)

*daogei*ing

hehe then went play room =D

we played truth or dare there lol

had lots of fun

they dare me to call lots of people*

and say i love them and stuff lol

and bian tai jiantatt

askk me wat colour is my ___ when i kena truth -.-

dirty minded..

then walk to my house

then main main

went home at 7+

____________________________________

happy birthday to my baby *april =) aka my dog lol

happy ermm 1 year old bday?

loliess and youre old no more puppy =P

ahaha

* i miss you

people who matter dont mind&people who mind dont matter =)

2007-12-27T21:12:00.000+08:00

someone told me that ive change..
said im perasan..?
lala..?
and stuff..
those words do hurt..
but i'll just d wat i wanna do
i dont have to live with wat theyre thinking..
cause if they think im those type of people..
maybe they dont know me well..
or maybe im just wat they think..
but i'll not be angry or even sad that they said that..
cause..thats wat they think i cant change it..
maybe its just meant to be like this..

i'll just smile like everythings alright =)
no one will ever know whats behide this smile...

christmass~* <3

2007-12-26T17:00:00.000+08:00

went neighbours house for the open house
the food was so nice =]]
then went adrianas house
charge my phone xD
use ** mad book lol
then went ou
meet they all
dream world.makan.
yipee cup =)
he went there also....-.-
and we left..
went shopping!
got a shirt and a skirt =))
then went cc for an hour
then shop..adriana went home i was the only girl lol.
hr went and get balloon lol x)

i got a
mp3-->daniella
softtoy-->kien yi
hair dryer&hp-->mummy
shirt&rm80 for shopping-->aunty jack
pink cybershot cam-->mummys fren
abottle of stars with lolipop-->someone..
a phone keychaing thingy with my bday on it-->bro
rm30 for shopping-->bro
a pencil box-->bro
hau run-->something&a balloon lol..

shopping~!

2007-12-23T22:40:00.000+08:00

yesterday nite went for the concert thingy thingy
was kinda urmm interesting lol
then half way went toilet so leave my jacket on the chair
and so then came back i didnt see it i though my mum like
urmm put it in the bag
so then didnt bother..
then realize today..
my mum didnt even touch my jacket -.-
my mum say i put it on the chair
should be when i stand up the sit went back and drop -.-
why didnt i though of that?haih haih
im just dumb-.-
went sunway today
meet phanida's fren lol
urmm shop.icecream.
had quite some fun =)
then went pasaar malam
ate "chou dou fu" =)
haha and my mouth was "chou" after tat
so went and buy a drink xD
haha cant wait till i go sunway with daniellaaa
hahaha we must do lots of shopping!
wheeee
wholeday my contacts was bothering me -.-
came back when i wanna take out i realize
the right one was like gonna go
behind my eye o.O
so scary i tryso hard to take out ler x)
then urmm urmm i spoiled 2 contacts =/
both also left
my nails to long so then koyak tiao
today when i saw the other one koyak was so angry
and i like make it into pieces x)
so thats mine day =))

countdown 2more days till christmas =)
and shopping with daniellaaaa =))
wheeee cant wait to go shopping =PP

everyone has to find our own happiness&i've found mine in you guys.

2007-12-20T13:10:00.000+08:00

yesterday my alarm rang at 9.30 lol but i off it n continue sleep

then kien yi start calling at 10 then i off my phone x)

haha i no i no im a lazy pig =P

then suddenly i remember have to fetch daniella

we're going ou loliess

then woke up mandi.wear mycontacts.makan

then finally we leave the house =DD

pick up danielllaa

and wheeeeee

we reach ou xDD

then meet kienyi.haurun.mingzhe.

missing out jian yong lol aka the rabbit boy

thenwe went bought ticket

the heart break kid

lol when we went in the cinema we only realize

it was 18sg -.-

and was kinda sick =/

after movie went wong kok for lunch =DD

ky treat us like small little kids lol

help us cut the meat and stuff -.-

ohhyaa

be4 the movie we went cc =)

for the 1st time loliess

it was kinda boring cause they dont have messenger xD

spend 1hour there

then went baseball or is it softball

then went home with daniellaa.hr.mz

send them home&me&d went for dinner

then dinner makan dan balik x)

then chit chat with mummys bestfriends daughter

cause they staying in ourhouse they came from sing.

makan watch tv online talk then 1++2 we sleep =D

the end of my day =)

she's enjoying her single life..

2007-12-18T14:35:00.000+08:00

maybee you'll think she's mean she broke up with me
she wont understand how much it hurts..
but u'll also nv understand how much it hurts
being with someone you dont even like..
membi starting this relationship its already
a mistake..
and all i can say is..
sorry ..

Now or never .

one long year

m.i.a

Jar of Hearts

Birthday wish for a special friend

Memorial Park

Exam xx

Life is unpredictable

Senior Year

2011

The end

2010

27th

Christmas !

Ugly Truth

Ads

It made me who i am right now

I'm tired

27th

Island trip

Happy thankgiving

Get a life...

super long update

thanks for the memories

I'm afraid :/

Halloween Party

Shopping spree

Trust no one, not even the closest one

i'm back :D

❤ ❤ ❤

Life isnt easy ;

Resolutions '09

Christmas ; Results

Team Edward ; Team Jacob

New Moon ; Edward Cullen

happy v day

you're my everything

one world

birthday wishes

red packets ;P

8 things guys wish you knew

hmmm?

2009 ❤

tag ;

christmas party

continue... pls :D

a short update

213 ❤

06.07.08

good news ?

*fill in the blanks* =P

updatee

<33

holidaaay

*update*

tears ?

-l-o-s-t-

partyyy !

aprilfool ~

happy 5th anniversary =P

*dots*

thanks for the memories ! =]

fcuking happy ! x)

finally out of the house =D

101 reasons why i love you =]

updatee ! x)

happy cina baru nian ! =]

read ! x)

the salty coffee. sweet <3

boys = complicated

happy happy fun fun day lol ♥

schools fun =]

random ♥

you drive me crazy but i love the way u do it <3

1st day of school..

pictures 31&1 =] =) =D

we had lots of fun together =]

missing yesterday

truth or dare?=]

people who matter dont mind&people who mind dont matter =)

fill in the blanks =P

update

dots